To be sure, most teachers already do an outstanding job of building rapport with their students. They see the value in it, and are intentional about creating positive relationship and ensuring students have a positive opinion of them, their classmates and the class overall. However, a few teachers will occassionaly tell me that they know building relationships with students is important, but that they “don’t have time” to do the things we suggest for building relationships. However, you REALLY don’t have time NOT TO! If students love your class, they’ll follow directions more accurately, work harder, treat each other kinder and generally be more pleasant to work with.
First, remember most of these should never be REQUIRED of students if the goal is to build positive vibes between the student and the teacher or the class as a whole.
To be fair, being yourself, showing empathy, treating students with respect and taking a genuine interest in their lives will usually be enough. But, sometimes a little "gimmick" here and there can help as well, especially with challenging classes.
Regardless, we're all always looking for a few new ideas. Try some of these out and let me know how they go!
1. Handshakes - I started off just creating an individual handshake for my most challenging students, as a way to “celebrate” their coming to class everyday. Then, I met a colleague who did this every day, with every student and I thought “I could do that” and eventually tried it myself, having 108 individual handshakes my last year in teaching. We all know students respond to being greeted at the door everyday, this takes it to the next level. Not feeling the physical contact? How bout a fist-bump or a “high-elbow” during flu season? No? Fine - just greet them at the door. But remember, physical contact is one of the 5 Love Languages and some of your students will appreciate the steril fist bump.
2. Bid them farewell - I used to stand at the door everyday and as students left we did a kind of “celebration” handshake I learned watching the St. Louis Cardinals’ post game. Kind of a high-five / low-five sort-of move. This could easily be a fist bump or “high-elbow” for the germ-nervous educators or another non-contact way of thanking students for their work that day.
3. Celebrations - Elementary schools frequently have morning huddle or “carpet time” where teachers and students take turns discussing non-academic things, sharing stories, etc. And as adult learners we talk frequently about the need to celebrate within our collaborative teams. My college football team even ended every practice by giving “positive” shout-outs to teammates who’d earned them. Why not do this with secondary students as well? Start with once a week, but you could easily start every class period by calling on students to “celebrate” something awesome that has happened recently. Maybe even encourage students to share celebrations of great things the class has accomplished (behavioral or academic) and have them recognize the great work of their colleagues (peers) as well.
4. Use props - I used to sit in the center of my room on a stool with a nerf ball, ask students how their weekend went, and causally start throwing the nerf ball around the room (gently, and always pre-teaching expectations). Other teachers have great success with silly hats or costumes, water guns, balloons, whatever. Shoot, I had a teacher once do an entire biology lecture with fake teeth leftover from Halloween. Anything you can tie into academic content gets a bonus because because the cross-wiring academics and silly helps learning stick in the student's brain, but at the least, you'll end up with some positive vibes for your efforts.
5. Food - The fastest way to an adolescent's heart is through their stomach. Different school's have different rules about this, but my "Oregon Trail" unit was way cooler with Trail mix, or authentic (ish) Oregon Trial cooking (soooo many beans and ham....). Pizza parties for meeting learning objectives are always a hit, and the best "hook" I ever used for persuasive writing was "Which of these represents the better dessert, the Oreos or the fruit? Make a claim, defend your claim with reasons, counterclaim and rebuttals, and enjoy the spoils".
6. Friday Freewrite - In lieu of a traditional “bellringer” or “warm-up” at the begining of class, on Friday’s I would offer a “Friday Freewrite” alternative. Students can write about whatever they want, and I’d always take volunteers (but never require) students to share out loud. We’d spend a fair amount of time on this early in the year as we were getting to know each other and I wanted to show that I valued their willingness to share and cared about what they had to say. Later on, I’d go out of my way to read the freewrites or talk with those who were often reluctant to share. Nothing wrong with not being willing to share something like this, but over time a few dominant personalities will control the share-outs, so it’s important to connect with those who’d rather not as well.
7. Bizzaro Bellringers - Similar to the Friday Freewrites, but sometimes my bellringers (which were often critical thinking questions, political cartoon or primary source analysis) were intentionally bizarre. Students loved when I’d say “Use historically accurate details, but write a science fiction short story in which Spongebob, Taylor Swift, Mr. Clements and Fortnite all appear in the Civil War time period.” The strange connections between modern pop culture and course content would often work to deepen student retention of content, but the silliness of the activity served to keep class light and give us something to laugh about.
8. 2x10 - I’ve seen this one in so many different places, I’m not even sure who to cite, but I certainly didn’t come up with it. Pick a student you’re struggling with, and spend two minutes a day with the student, for ten consecutive days (excluding weekends, obviously). During those two minutes, talk about ANYTHING that’s not related to school. Ask questions and do your best to keep the student talking. Be genuine, and show interest. If you do these things, I’ve never seen this fail to yield positive results with a student.
9. Music - I was in love with the music from Hamilton, and as a social studies teacher, I was able to fit it into my content fairly easily. A former colleague once did a figurative unit language centered around music, in which students had to interpret the true meaning of a song, which was great critical thinking and a fun way to teach the subject in addition to building relationships (students summative assessment was interpreting the song of their choice assuming certain figurative language elements existed). Additionally, I once knew a teacher who had a “song a day” on a rotating basis, with each kid getting to play one song for the group everyday, while another former colleague played “Name that tune/artist” occasionally with kids. Finally, I know a teacher who once committed to finding “the most annoying sound ever” and challenged students to bring in audio clips of the most annoying sounds. I’m not quite that brave or patient, but the kids loved her for it.
10. Joke of the Week - A know a high school teacher who has a “joke of the week” every Friday. They’re terrible, almost intentionally so. But kids look forward to it and it develops a sense of classroom history and culture. Kids know he’s going to do it. Plus, with the internet, you never have to worry about coming up with more.
I work with a lot of teachers who say “I’m not funny so kids don’t like me”. As Jack Berckemeyer would say, “I can teach you to be funny...next time kids aren’t paying attention walk over to the white board and start gently rubbing it saying “I love you white board...you always listen to me when I talk to you….you always follow directions when I need you too.” They’ll think you’re nuts, or funny, but either way they’ll pay attention. :)
11. Class timeline - One of the things that draws people together is a sense of shared history. To this end, I would take pictures of my class on a semi-regular basis (usaully the same ones I shared in newsletters or on Twitter) and then print them out, handing them up in chronological order. You’d be amazed how much time (and which) students will spend looking back at the pictures. You can get a head start on this by pulling old yearbook/social media pictures from years prior, showing them to students, telling stories, etc. Reminiscing is a powerful unifier.
12. Catchphrases - Ask students what are some things you say all the time. They might surprise you. Mine would obviously point out things like “Ladies and gentlemen can I have your attention please” (my go-to attention signal) or “In a minute but not yet” but they might have a few fun additions as well. As students left my room everyday and I “bid them farewell” I would say “Be great today!”, a sentiment students would quote me on later in the year. “You’re killing me, Smalls!”, “Whoo, history!” and “I hope I have five kids just like you” are all “catchphrases” I’ve been accused of having. If nothing else, you’ll be learn some things about yourself!
13. Games - Building in silly games into your classroom culture is so easy and so effective, it’s almost cheating. Seriously, I had “Friday Gamedays” for a while, just because students would work so much harder and focus so much more if I told them throughout the week “If we don’t get [x] accomplished, we’re not going to be able to play games on Fridays” or “This is not the way we treat people if we hope to have fun on Fridays”.
You know that obnoxious “bottle flip” challenge thing kids were obsessed with for a bit? Embrace it - spend five minutes a week encouraging everyone to play in your class. Just pre-teach expectations that “if we can’t put the bottles (games, etc) away and focus on learning when I need us to then I guess we’re not going to be able to do that anymore. That will usually do the trick. Need some more “game” ideas for your classroom? Click HERE.
14. "Two Truths & a Lie" - This one is kind of game-ish, but you tell the students two "truths" about yourself, followed by one "lie". Then, ask them to guess which was which. After revealing, ask students to volunteer to share "two truths" and a "lie" about themselves, and the class guesses which is which as well. Be sure not to require it of students, but it's kind of fun!
15. Attend their extra-curricular activities - Remember what you were super passionate about as a student? It was probably EXTRA curricular or CO-curricular activities, not "curriculum". It was sports, choir, band, debate, theater, quiz bowl, or any of the other countless activities students are passionate about. Show up to these and BE VISIBLE, interact with other students while you're there, and make it a point to talk to the students about the event later, especially if you're offering positive feedback (don't coach or critisize, that won't help you).
What do you think? Did we forget something that makes your students love your class? Did we share something you’ve tried that turned into a train wreck? Hit us up on Twitter @Edunators or @MarkClementsEdu and let us know what you think or shoot me an email at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.
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